What a day!!! I had a great day at clinicals, rushed home and changed for the memorial service for the loss of a friend's dad. It was later this evening that I did it! I made the decision to walk with Christ,actively! The memorial service was inspirational because the man that passed away led a very Godly life, and so did his family. I was amazed at how many people were there to support the family.
When I'm feeling suicidal, I often wonder if anyone that I cherish, would be sad, or relieved... I didn't think much about living "for God" much after the service. Then, I got a text from a friend that was suicidal. I randomly texted her back with a way to cope until I could call her. She said it was an "awesome" idea and how did I come up with it... I do it, but telling her, I knew it would work and God gave me the words to explain to her. She did it, and is now peacefully typing some stuff and chatting on facebook. I called her to hear what she wrote and then words literally flew from my mouth! I KNOW they were not my words, because I struggle with and often do the very things I was telling her not to. However, at the same time, I was realizing, God was doing some molding on my heart. I have a COMPLETE desire to live my life for Him!!! I CAN NOT wait to reach Heavens Gates, and hear, "well done, my good and faithful servant".
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. Phil. 1:21 It's truly my heart! I would be at peace if I were to go tonight, but am SO excited to live the life Christ has laid out for me, and to share Him with many others!!!
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