So mom says to me tonight, "going to the store, want new jeans?" me: "no thank you" mom: " you really need bigger jeans" Well, thank you for that, because I'm not already hard on myself about it. Now, the diet is going to be salads and protein shakes, and gotta workout more. I'd like a workout buddy, but looks like I'm alone in something else once again.
Ok, only 60 mg of Valium tonight. I've GOTTA stop! I'm not addicted, I just do it to be rebellious! God will get me back I'm sure. He's a bitter God. I don't even know what the hell to do next. Tomorrow I'm supposed to hang out with a friend and her family, and quite frankly, I'm getting anxious about it.
Today I did it! I stuck to a healthy diet! Gotta continue. If salad, chicken, or my protein shakes aren't available, I'm not eating. If I eat anything else, may have to resort to inducing vomiting, which I'm not sure I can do anymore since it's been so long. That's enough for tonight. I'm drinking my shake and taking my meds, then going to bed!!!
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