I'm considering going "public" with my blog. I've had about 1,000 readers, and can see God's work in my own life through reading it. I really want it to help someone, even ONE person. I would have to figure out how to do it without my mom finding it... I'll pray about it. For now, I'll remain anonymous.
Today was a good day. I got frustrated when my classmates came over to do our take home test. Three of us had it done, one did not. I spent THREE hours looking for all 60 correct answers. The one friend came, not having done more than five of the questions. I simply said, "This took me a long time, you really didn't do it?" So, I had a hard time just handing her the answers. She said she was tired because she worked yesterday, which is why she didn't get her test done. We have had two weeks. I did mine a week ago. She said to me, "I actually WORK, people don't just pay me to sit on a couch." This comment hit me, and hard. Yes, when I babysit I do have some time to work on school work, but to claim I do nothing but sit on a couch and get paid?! I'm hurt. I know babysitting isn't all that hard most of the time, but it is a lot of work. It's a WHOLE LOT more than sitting on a couch. Am i wrong in thinking babysitting really is work???
Today church was amazing! My pastor talked about allowing God to change us, and let go of our chains and shame. I found myself thinking about the fact that I won't commit to letting go of self-harm completely. I need to pray about that. I don't think I'll do anything again, but I thought that over a year ago too. I guess I better start praying now!
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